That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
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