We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
