dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
