I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Are my feet made of real feet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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