btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
