let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
