weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
