I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
