is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
