My pussy is not your playground.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize