I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
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