Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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