Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Will you blow on my dice?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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