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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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