you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize