I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
my nose is crying tears of wow.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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