Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
