Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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