respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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