Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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