It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We talked him into tasing himself.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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