is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
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