Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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