Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Randomize