it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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