I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
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