Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize