I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
