so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
