i always forget guys have bellybuttons
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
