You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
