Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
