from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
did you just send me my own nude
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
