Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Just puked most of my soul out..
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
