he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
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The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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