He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
