I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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