I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize