Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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