Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
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his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
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It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize