Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize