My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
