Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
