Too much gin, very little bucket
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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