She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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