i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
