Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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