i may or may not be watching the land before time
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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