just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
