yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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