oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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