I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
